A new take on responsibility

Today, I started working in a new class. US History, but that fact is irrelevant. As I was sitting there just kind of taking in the class and trying to figure out what my role will be I started looking around. This particular teacher has a lot of random things on the walls: maps, laminated newspaper pages from long ago, rules, etc. 

One of the more interesting quote-like things that I read was a 3 step guide to success. The first step was to always take ownership for your actions. This is a commonly used phrase, I am sure that many of us have heard it numerous times during the course of our lifetime. However, for the first time in my life the statement was followed by a conditional statement.

The statement read, “Remember: You are not always responsible for everything that is done to you, but you are responsible for how you respond to it.” I sat that there and thought about that for quite a while. 

Working in a high school has taught me a lot. It has taught me that, at times, I was most likely so frustrating to my teachers and other school faculty that they wanted to pull their own hair out of their head. Yes, this is a feeling I experience weekly. That being said, I have also learned that respect for authority is dying more and more in each generation. I am not too far removed from the generation that I am currently teaching, most of the kids I work with are only like 8 years younger than I am, but they are so different than I was. 

The most glaring difference is an insane sense of entitlement. When presented with a request to stop texting, stop talking, stop touching each other, stop sleeping, or asking them to participate in class they respond like we (faculty) are taking away their first amendment right to speak, like we are violating their civil rights.

This brings me back to that conditional statement under “take ownership for your actions.” I will repeat it again in case you are just skimming my blog.  “Remember: You are not always responsible for everything that is done to you, but you are responsible for how you respond to it.” Man, what if we sought for our young people to live according to this statement. 

While I don’t for a second that I am being unreasonable when I ask a student to stop talking, they seem to believe that I am. The excuses I get are too many to list. The big ones though: “we were talking about the assignment, so and so talked to me first, why are you singling me out – everyone else talks.” Not one of those responses is the student taking responsibility for their own action. I don’t care the reason; they should not be talking when the teacher is talking, end of story. 

What if, instead of giving me an excuse, the student just said “ok.” They may not have been responsible for the talking, but they are responsible for how they respond to my request. That simple, one-syllable word solves so much. No argument between them and me has to ensue and we are able to get back on task much more quickly.

Sorry, if this blog has been disorganized and confusing. I hope you have stayed with me. I have related this idea of taking ownership of what you do to my students, but I think there is an important lesson for everyone here, especially followers of Jesus.

The Bible is pretty clear that no one is going to experience persecution more than Christians. We are going to be dealt a lot of things that we don’t “deserve.” That being said, what better way to emulate Jesus than responding with love and forgiveness in those times instead of debate and anger? Jesus gave us the perfect example with the words that he said on the cross after being physically and emotionally beaten. “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” We may not always be responsible for what is done to us, but we are most certainly responsible for how we respond and guess what, the world is watching even more in the moments they don’t expect to respond with Christ. Prove them wrong.